Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Pigs Interview


Pigs Interview

Rainman Writes:

For those of you who are wondering, Thunder Roads Writer Pig is recovering nicely and the culprit(s) still have not been caught.  Pig hasn’t said much, he sort of mumbles gibberish while on his pain meds.  Two things I have learned about Pig:
1.  Never try to teach Pig how to sing.
2.  Never try to talk to Pig when he is “high” on his pain meds.
Both are a waste of time and annoy Pig.

I was able to get a few questions answered when I handed Pig a beer.  He shotgunned the beer, sat bolt right up.  His eye popped open and he was his normal drunkard self for about five minutes.  I still need to know what he remembers about that night.  It is the only way we can find the culprit(s) who did this to Pig.  So quickly I fired off as many questions as I could.

RM:  “Pig, what do you remember after going to bed?”
Pig:   “I was dreaming of beer and boobs.”

RM:   “Who’s boobs?”
Pig:   “Big ones.”

RM:   “Pig, what happened when you were assaulted?”
Pig:   “I was asleep, then someone sucker punched me in the gut.”

RM:   “Then what happened?”
Pig:   “It was dark and I couldn’t see.  I started to fight back.  I was swinging wildly and I kept feeling something cut me.  I remember putting the assailant in a headlock.  We tumbled and I remember falling.  Then nothing else till I woke up in the hospital.”

RM:   “Do you remember anything at the hospital?”
Pig:   “I remember seeing cleavage and two big soft boobs.”

RM:   “Did you see your assailant?”
Pig:   “No Dumb-ass, I told you it was dark.”

RM:   “Do you remember anything else, any smells, feelings, ECT?”
Pig:   “Yeah, I remember bad breath, someone needed a Tic-tac.”

RM:   “Pig, before you had mentioned Bacon and Sizzle, what do those words mean?”
Pig:   “Not sure, I remember someone saying those words in a sentence.  But I cannot remember who it was that said it.”
RM:   “Do you have anyone mad at you?”
Pig:   No answer, Pig fell back asleep.

Here are the facts of what we know so far:

  1. The room was dark.
  2. Pig was sucker punched.
  3. He was knocked out hitting his head on the self falling to the floor.
  4. The assailant (one) had bad breath.
  5. He remember someone possibly threatening to cook him.
  6. Pig likes nurses with cleavage and big boobs.

All right folks, spread the word.  See if anyone knows anything.  Let us know ASAP.  You can leave a comment here or on Facebook.  Lets help Pig find justice while he rests.  We need him back writing as soon as he can.

Ride Hard or Stay Home

Rainman

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